hereinevitably | talking about every nct member: lightning round

did this completely off the top of my head so like. these are quick takes on everyone. like what first comes to mind. i tried to do this in age order but also could not be fucked to google exact birthdays. so it is in age order-ish.

taeil - thank God for men who can sing

johnny - looks like the grinch and onceler combined. we have got to put a stop to the Tumblr sexymen era. genuinely cannot see how ppl think he is hot also his personality just rubs me the wrong way

yuta - asshole (?) it's been so long I don't really remember the details but I have the distinct impression of him leaving a bad taste in my mouth. bc of this I resent him for being one of the only 127 members imo that is capable of being sexy

taeyong - why does he dance. like that. it is so affected. I do not like it. also I have not liked his styling in a while i think boss era was probably his peak

kun - nct earth sign 1/3. and the sole capricorn in fact. why did he have to be an nft bro. I am not allowed a single nice thing ever

ten - would probably pay attention to him more if he was not stuck in the one nct unit I never got into. he's fine

doyoung - thank God for men who can sing (2) obsessed with how he is the butt of every joke ever

jaehyun - the man who got me into nct. I think it is great how he is just a cryptid. what is going through this man's head?

winwin - would also pay attention to him more if he wasn't stuck in wayv. fly high

jungwoo - I liked him more when he was new to nct unfortunately. his humor feels overdone most of the time to me

lucas - forgot all about him until I was counting the members in this list to see if I got them all. asshole. have genuinely never liked him for reasons i could not place my finger on. and now I have reasons to place my finger on

hendery - asshole redux

mark - nct leo 1/3 genuinely I do not think that I pay attention to him unless he is interacting with other members (jaemin). also his visuals are very hit or miss to me and I think they have not hit since wgu era. why is his poetry like that?

xiaojun - nct leo 2/3 why is he like that. every time I see a tweet about him I think What is wrong with him. also his ugly moments are special to me as they are often in a language I actually speak. like the misogyny just hits different. i would stan him ironically

renjun - who doesn't like renjun. i miss his little snaggletooth it was so cute. unfortunately i do not like his longer hair that much (mullet, hot sauce two-tone) nor his shorter hair. they discovered the perfect boy group hairstyle years ago and just can't accept it sometimes change is Bad. go back to go era hair.

jeno - nct earth sign 2/3. I am very fond of him. he is genuinely just a lovely boy like jeno !!! jeno. jeno. thank god for his presence in dream

haechan - I love it when people are annoying and obnoxious. enter lee haechan

jaemin - nct leo 3/3. the perfect bastard Leo man in fact. he has an iron grip on me. his idolsona development is literally so. this little freakish guy who also has such great capacity for love but is also secretly a monster. gets away with many things purely because of his face. shares the same birthday as my ex who i had a crush on for like 7 years??? fun ash facts. the sole thing keeping me invested in nct most of the time

yangyang - um I forget he exists most of the time unless he's with the rest of the greater nct 00 line re: I do not pay attention to wayv at all. he's fine

shotaro - I also forgot he existed. rip to having to get shoved into a group with 22 other men. i didn't like his voice that much in maw or universe but then again he only got like one line in each

sungchan - nct earth sign 3/3. he is so funny to me. this stupid tall extroverted Virgo man who leaked a bunch of sm secrets to a carat just because he wanted a hook-up. How is he real? like I have zero emotional attachment to him but he is fascinating to me. would study under a microscope

chenle - I commend his ability to be open about everything but also am horrified bro wdym you don't repress every thought you've ever had. oh my god

jisung - he's so cute. I luv how he is scared of everything and yet still so full of wonder for the world.

my one final note is that i am extremely susceptible to what people around me think so like if anyone has strong opinions on someone who i have not explicitly deemed asshole or johnny i could probably be persuaded to have positive thoughts for a second. before going back to general apathy + jaemin disease